I won't be given general anesthesia, apparently. Just a spinal. Of course everyone avoids general anesthesia whenever possible because of the risks.
So I asked the surgeon, "Just how awake will I be?" He said, "It's up to you. Some people want to watch; some don't."
My first reaction was, I don't want to watch and listen while someone cuts my leg off, put me out, but upon further reflection I've reconsidered. I'm sure it's fascinating, and if I were given enough of something so I didn't experience any anxiety it might be better to be present and to see. We are marvelously made, after all. And I'm sure the new knee is a marvel of a different sort.
Also, thinking about being present gives me the illusion of control.
It should make a great story to tell at parties too.
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indeed, a great story... I wonder if you have enough of something to eliminate all anxiety, if you will then be able to focus well on the events of significance, or if you will be distracted by other aspects of the experience. I guess you'll see.
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